Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
