goodnight i made you a song goodbye
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
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