dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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