Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
