how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
