ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
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