Why are handjobs necessary in class?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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