You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
