I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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