Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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