I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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