You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
