how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
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