I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
