Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
