So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
