the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize