I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
