I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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