How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
we should paint friendship bongs
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
