Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize
