You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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