Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Who knew there were so many rules and judgements about laying on a kitchen floor. I'm all like I'm resting. It just happens to be on a kitchen floor.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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