oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
