whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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