I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
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