Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
don't judge my taste in strippers
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
