I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Be still, my beating vagina.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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