She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
