Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
