u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
