super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
