YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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