I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
