i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
The cab driver told me he hopes I look up to him as a father figure. Then he asked if I wanted him to take me to the hospital
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
You were trust falling into bushes
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Randomize
