I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize