their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I just pynch a tree in the face
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
