ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I pour the whiskey from now on
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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