As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
wakey wakey hands off snakey
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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