Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
We got so high we made milksteak
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Randomize
