I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
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