Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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