Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
