she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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