this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
