i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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