Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
