Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
