Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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