i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
