Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
Houston, we have a squirter
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Randomize